Sleep, Love and Your Baby's Brain
New evidence shows that some approaches to 'teaching babies to sleep' may cause long term, adverse changes to a baby's developing brain.

Pinky McKay (author, Sleeping Like a Baby, 100 Ways to Calm the Crying, Internationally Certified Lactation Consultant and infant massage instructor), examines this evidence and offers gentle options to encourage infant sleep and settling that also promote optimum brain and emotional development, along with a secure parent-infant bond.


Pinky is a best-selling author and sought-after public speaker.   She also regularly appears on major network TV stations.  

For example, celebrity opinion is that the mother has 'issues' about letting go if she practises 'attachment parenting' -  co-sleeping, baby wearng and, especially, breastfeeding a toddler - one year seemed the 'acceptable breastfeeding age' on the Today Show.

After that, the mother is supposedly 'hanging on' to the child. One of the guest commentators even talked about how one of her friends almost had orgasms while she breastfed it was so pleasurable. 

Then they suggested that it could be harmful "because how will those children grow up?" Thankfully, there was a much more balanced discussion on the Morning show, with Cam, the male host and a father, suggesting many people aren't breastfeeding long enough.  
My 'beef' is actually with the cover headline:  'Are you Mom enough?"  While my reaction to the photo was just 'wow! he's a big boy for three,' I was more stunned by the headline and how once again this is a media stunt that pits mums against each other. I always hated the saying 'a good enough mother' - who the hell defines what 'enough' is? We are all 'enough' for our kids, just the way we are. None of us sets out to be  less than 'enough' even though some days we fall short of our own ideals and those of various 'experts' ( this means anyone who claims to know more about YOUR child than you do). It's this self judgement and the judgement of others that is destructive to our self - esteem as mothers. We need to be strong to stay true to ourselves and our little ones and when we can do this, we can nurture with confidence - and this is what makes us 'good enough' , not some ridiculous standards bar defined by anyone who wants to add their two bobs worth about what we 'should' be doing. 

We can’t simply say ‘sleeping with your baby is unsafe’ because the reality is that it happens - and for most of the world’s population, it’s a reality that wouldn’t be questioned. In some countries such as Japan where co-sleeping is common place, deaths from sleep accidents are rare. I know many parents who have or are sleeping snuggled next to their babies, perfectly safely.  My own five babies slept with us until they eventually they outgrew the need to ‘wander in’.  
The thing is though, when parents sleep with babies on sofas, if they are smokers, on medications or drugs, including alcohol that impair their awareness of their baby it isn’t safe to sleep with your baby.  So, please, discuss with your partner whether you can both accept responsibility for sharing a bed with your baby and please take care to create a safe sleep space wherever you plan to put your baby to sleep.

Pinky is a best-selling author and sought-after public speaker.   She also regularly appears on major network TV stations.